Kazagumo's Diary
by Kazagumo
Summary: The daily drag of a naval base through the eyes of a humble destroyer. Also, if you have any ships you want put in, put a comment, and I'll do my best. Work in progress, and first story, constructive criticism appreciated.
1. Page 1

Alright. So, Katori-san's got this somewhat crazy idea to have me keep a journal, or as it is, a diary. So, I am. I know you're probably going to read this at one point or another, Akigumo, so I'm sorry to say that I will not be professing my secret deep love for you or anyone else in this book.

Alright, now we've gotten _that_ out of the way, I can finally get starte-

 _The words are rather jumbled there._

So basically, Akigumo is already kicking into action. I made the mistake of writing in ink, and she shook my hand a bunch, giving you, or me, I don't know, that lovely jumble there.

I am writing in pencil now.

Of course, this wouldn't be a journal without me chronicling things. Bear with me, as I don't really know how to relay the events. Should I write a narrative? Do time stamps? Whatever. In any case, I had an interesting run in with Akashi today, since I'm being prepared for my Kai upgrade. I was messing around with something on the wall, a lever, which in hindsight considering where I was was an absolutely terrible place to do such things. Nothing really bad happened, but I did incur the wrath of Akashi for doing it, and I had a near miss with a can of Neon Blue paint flying in my direction. When I looked over, Akashi was on the other side of the workshop as if nothing happened. I even went so far as to ask her about it, and I got the most vague answer imaginable.

"Hm? I don't see why anyone'd be throwing things if you were behaving yourself."

I felt it was the safe thing to end it there, as I didn't want my sole equipment to be two zuiun catapult launchers.

On another note, Admiral Kobayashi, AKA our fleet admiral, is planning some kind of big offensive, and he told all his subordinate admirals to try to upgrade all possible ships to make for maximum efficiency. I think even the German submarine we have, 511 is going to get a Kai 2 upgrade.

Admiral Miwa, my direct commanding officer is in the hospital as a result of Kongou trying to further herself with her. I asked Hyuuga, in hindsight a terrible move, what had happened, and I got an even more vague answer than Akashi's.

"Kongou is not good at making chocolate."

I said there had to be more to it, but she said I was too young to understand, which tells me quite a bit, to be frank. If they say I'm too young, it's obviously something that would "Be over my head."

Let's just say I'm surprised the Commander hasn't gotten a restraining order.


	2. Page 2

So it's almost Halloween, as I'm sure you all know. On its own, if we have decent, sane ships on this base, it'd be fine.

Of course, we don't have a single decent, sane ship.

Before I go into that however, I do want to mention that U-511 got her Kai Ni, and holy, is she different. My personal opinion is that Iku had some major tampering with her upgrades, but who knows. She's really extroverted and loud now, much like the aforementioned I-19.

She also got one hell of a tan.

But I digress. Halloween is nearly here. I think the Shiratsuyus are going as canines. **Real original.** I say this because that's what they've gone as for the last two years, and probably before that. Akatsuki have assorted stuff, I saw Ikazuchi with a skeleton jump suit, I'm fairly certain Inazuma literally put a pumpkin on her head, Akatsuki is going as her model person, a Victorian lady, where she got the dress I'll never know, and Hibiki has a very good Stalin costume. I hope that's not tobacco in the pipe, or Gangut's going to lose her shit, as she's always making her not smoke.

I'm not sure how, but Makigumo convinced me to go in the horse costume again. God help me. I'm fairly certain Akigumo's going as Michelangelo or Donatello or some of those people, Yuugumo a witch, Hayashimo and Naganami the twins from the Shining, no matter how much I told them they look different, they merely responded with "Redrum." Rest of them can't make up their minds, at least in my class.

Hiryuu and Souryuu are doing a two person dragon costume, which Unryuu was rather upset to not be a part of, Kaga is going as an onigiri, which I'm fairly certain she won't get through the night without Akagi trying to eat her costume. Speaking of Akagi, she's going as herself, which is confusing.

Kongou sisters are probably going as their obsession again, aka admirals, Tenryuu and Tatsuta have... some sort of weird master/pet thing going on with their costumes, kind of giving me a weird vibe, no doubt Tatsuta is the mastermind.

The germans are constantly spewing they will have the best costumes, as 'Ve have ze zooperior engineering, jaw.' Bismarck has one helluva Darth Vader costume, Graf is Luke Skywalker. I'm not sure whether to write U-511, or RO-500 as she insists on being called now in here, as I'm frankly not sure which group she belongs to. Lebe and Max are doing the Luke Skywalker/Princess Leia dynamic, which apparently has caused much ranting in German in Germany, as everyone calls the 1 story building flying the Kriegsmarine flag.

Then, there's the Americans. Iowa is going as Kongou for some reason I haven't the slightest of. Saratoga is wearing some kind of 'prairie dress' that apparently American women wore in the late 19th century. Nebraska is going as the guy from Tron, which makes absolutely 0 sense. That'd be like me trying to go as Sean Connery or someone. It wouldn't work at all. Then again, that ship is an oddity. 6 inches shorter than me, yet packs 50cm cannons. Yeah, I'm tall for a destroyer, but still. Whatever. Fletchers are going as a horde of zombies, which will be **terrifying.** There's 42 of them on base, and oh god. They also dominate the illegal candy market. I didn't know a Hershey bar could cost 34k yen.

I won't mention the submarines as I don't know what they're doing, but I'm fairly certain its some mass nude streaking, just like last year. I feel so bad for Taigei.

Zuikaku is going as a knight, Shoukaku as a princess, a cute combination. The Frenchies are dressed in Great War garb, for some reason Béarn and Teste are wearing Adrian helmets, Dunkerque and La Fantasque officer uniforms. I'm fairly certain all the training cruisers are going to wear black again, just like last year and take out all the bottled up rage they have with us destroyers out on unsuspecting ships.

I'm also fairly certain if Admiral Miwa is out of the hospital she'll be going as the Emperor from Star Wars. Good thing she isn't able to be blackmailed by the Germans.

I'm fairly certain Warspite, Prince of Wales, Ark Royal and the other Brits won't lower themselves enough to partake in this clusterfuck. To be honest, I don't blame them. Lake and Geneva are going to be in hell, aka the two UN peace keepers.

I think Inazuma Convinced Miyuki to put a bunch of fake blood on her torso, in a rather mornid representation of Miyuki sinking.

Shimakaze is going as Sonic. I'm frankly disappointed.


	3. Page 3

So. As I expected, no major event at this god-forsaken naval base is able to pass without someone winding up in the docks for a couple days.

The unlucky soul, as there has to be one, was Harusame. Then again, she won't be missing out on all that much, as the Shiratsuyu costumes were horrible to begin with. I wonder whose idea they were. Totally not the self-appointed partylord, Yuudachi.

But yeah, as I was saying. I was unable to get all the details of her getting docked for a week, but from what I've been able to piece together, Murasame, despite all Harusame's denial of this fact, is her girlfriend. I personally never understood the whole dating scene on base, as I can't possibly see anyone falling in love with someone like myself. I mean, look at me, not much to love there.

In any case. As far as I can gather, Murasame decided to prank or something Harusame. Harusame, being the meek soul she was, was so surprised at the prank, of the particularly scary timewhich apparently caused her to fall backwards over a second floor railing, landing smack on her back 12 feet down, cracking it. She had to be carried to the docks. Fortunately we aren't humans, as I've heard that if Admiral Miwa were to do that, she'd probably die or be crippled for the rest of her life. But with us, we just sit in a bath for an ungodly boring amount of time.

In any case, the rear end of the horse costume got swapped to Yuugumo, since Makigumo decided she wants to ride it. We now have to carry two planks on our shoulders, to allow her to sit.

A new ship was commissioned as well. A Mutsuki-Class, Kisaragi. Haven't gotten much first impression of her yet, but Mutsuki appears to be joined to the hip with her. Kind of like Ooi and Kitakami. She seems nice enough though.

Akigumo stabbed my neck with a pocky stick, and somehow I'm bleeding. Gonna go get that fixed up.


	4. Page 4

So, Miwa gave Harusame an instant repair bucket since she doesn't want her to miss out on the whole experience. For some reason we do it on the 25th instead of the 31st, due to Admiral Kobayashi deciding to put the operation on the 31st. Ironic, considering how the enemy literally looks, you'd think they'd be quite effective on that day. Speaking of, my Kai upgrade is scheduled for tomorrow, so I won't be able to eat my candy really tonight.

Also important to mention is I met the new ship, and she gave a fairly horrible first impression. Basically, the base has this rather archaic tradition of having an arm wrestling tournament between destroyer classes because of the fact nothing bigger than one of us would lower themselves so to clean up all those wrappers, and probably carry several passed out ships, from either candy or alcohol, depending on class, to their dorm. At least I won't have to run the Training Cruiser gauntlet. Akigumo was in the docks for a couple days after she messed up. Then again they were more than likely extra brutal to her.

However. It was down to Yuugumo-Class versus Mutsuki-Class, and since I was the only one who hadn't gone to bat yet, I was put in, against Kisaragi. Should've been easy, since Mutsuki are pre-Special type, and I am one of the most advanced destroyers on base, not to mention I probably have 8 inches on Kisaragi. Of course, she played **dirty.**

We linked hands, and began to go at it. I had plans to make it quick and relatively painless for the other, but she hadn't accepted defeat, so when I went harder, she literally stared into my eyes, a rather lewd expression upon her face, and she uttered a few lines along these lines.

"Ah... Kazagumo-san is going so hard..."

That, understandably made me **very** uncomfortable, so when I hastened to finish this up, she took it a step further.

"Kazagumo-san... Your hand is so big..."

I lost it, and just gave up, much to the chagrin of my sisters.

I'm fairly certain Hayashimo put a bucket of sand all along my bed.

But, we're going to have to clean up tonight. Hopefully the trick or treating will be good, and I don't get murdered by the Training Cruisers.


	5. Page 5

(Sorry I haven't been writing, to my silent fan base, if I have one. Been busy and all.)

Halloween was pretty uneventful. The most interesting thing to happen was Akigumo getting a 4 day stint in the docks thanks to some ships in black assaulting her and breaking several bones. I just stood in the corner, and when asked, I just said I must've hit my head, cause I couldn't remember.

I have too much to live for to turn in the culprits.

On another note, I got my Kai! Quite nice, got a couple new fairies who extend my view range really well, and air radar which lets me know when planes are coming from quite a distance. I was comatose for a day and a half, but I'm fine. The operation itself was boring for me, but we did lose a ship, one of the Fletchers who ate a torpedo from a submarine.

Early November was boring, since we have RR for 3 weeks. I've been stuck with that one Mutsuki-Class, Kisaragi, who I'd say is about on a par with Akigumo annoyance wise. Not so much loud and overly jokeful, but the amount of sexual innuendo I hear that girl drop is insane. It's very subtle, just enough you can figure it is, but you'd have to be paying attention. When I was out of my coma, I forgot my tie in my sleepy haze, and she said "Ah... Kazagumo-chan without her tie looks..." she paused for effect. " _Nice._ "

First off, I don't even know at what point she decided we were close enough for -Chan, and the tone of voice she used made it all the worse. I'm fairly certain Akigumo is already shipping us, despite there being nothing at all to indicate that. She reminds me of Yuugumo, to be honest.

Also Commander's in the hospital again since Kongou apparently forced her. Since this happened I'm damn sure the other three's libidos are kicking into full gear, along with about every other damn ship on base. Ugh. I think she has a restraining order now, too.


End file.
